I have been called many names in life. Some bad, some good. In recent years, I find myself responding to names like; Mom, Mommy, Mama….Frankie’s Mommy, Matt’s wife, Frank and Mary Ann’s daughter, Beth’s sister.
And yet all of those names only reflect one part of my life, at a time. When I got married in my late twenties, I was told by someone (forgive me because I do not remember where I heard this exactly) how to introduce myself. My name always should come first, THEN….”Matt’s wife.” “Hi, I am Meg, Matt’s wife.” You may ask, how this is different than “I’m Matt’s wife, Meg.”
Quite simply, the essence of who I am comes first…then the role I am in. I am confident enough in myself, to know that I am a person, outside of my husband. I can stand alone. My identity is tied to who I am to myself. Yes, I am proud to be Matt’s wife…but first, I am me. I am Meg.
I was reminded of this when I saw a random blog posting and the user’s id was “MomofSueandJim.” I thought to myself….but who is that Mom? What does she pride herself on? What are her dreams? What does she do for fun, by herself? Finally, who is she outside of her kids, Sue and Jim?
Okay, maybe I am going to extremes here, but really…how do you introduce yourself? Do you consistently put your kids’ names first? Your husband’s name first? (Just like we put their needs first, at times!)
Do you stick your hand out confidently, ready to shake and state confidently who you are? What does this say about how you feel about yourself?
Who are you, outside of your family? Are you confident being you? Do you feel good, being you?