Guilt Free Tip #18 – Where is Your Self Sacrificing Line?

When we become a Mom, there is a tall order of self sacrificing involved.  This is quite understandable.  A child’s life is completely dependent on ours.  In the very beginning, everything we do, say, think, and at times even, eat…affects our child.  We learn early on, to put our child first and we continue to do this because that is the selflessness which is required of us.  It teaches us good things about living for another purpose than just ourselves. We grow, personally, emotionally and spiritually from this rich experience and become a better human being by this act of self sacrificing.

What happens when we take self sacrificing too far?  Do we know when to draw the line?  A dear friend of mine, who had her 1^st child before many of our friends were even married, used to paint a terrible picture of the first few months of motherhood.  She said that she’d go days and days without showering because her child always needed her and she didn’t have the time.  I thought to myself…can it really be that bad?  I NEED a shower to get my day started.   Sure enough, my 1^st baby came and I still managed to get in a shower, daily.  Some days that meant my kid sat in a baby seat in my bathroom and cried for 10 minutes…but I still got that shower!    Decreasing her frequency of showers did not bother my friend as much as it did me.  I had other things I sacrificed but showering was not one of them.  I drew the self sacrificing line.

Kids grow up and their needs change.  And so do OUR needs!  When a Mom constantly puts her children’s and husband’s needs in front of her own…what is that doing to the woman inside? Slowly and quietly, that woman’s desires, dreams, goals get lost until one day, she realizes and asks herself….what happened to me?  It’s never too late (or too early) to stand up and take inventory about what YOU, as a mom, are willing to sacrifice and what you are NOT willing to sacrifice.    Matt, my husband and I know that I will not sacrifice my friendships. Matt will not sacrifice his golf game J…we know this, we drew the line and we figure this out when evaluating our priorities.  It is a trick balancing act. It is not easy…but it is worth it.  Be proactive and ask yourself….

Where is your self sacrificing line?