A while ago, I was asked in the school parking lot, how on earth I balance being a Mom to three young kids, a college instructor, and owner of my own professional speaking business. I was truly shocked…. Did I LOOK like I was “balancing it all”? because I certainly did not feel that way! I brushed it off with as much humility and self-deprecating humor as I could politely provide.
Little did my parking-lot-friend know… I just lost it on my kids thirty minutes earlier, and was completely overwhelmed by the day ahead of me. I was doubting myself professionally AND thinking of the tornado of activity that left my house a disaster area. All these things were on my mind when I sailed into my kid’s school that day. I reassured my friend that I have my struggles, and actually offered up a few examples. The LAST thing I wanted for her was to start comparing our situations because of her perception of me. I pointed out how much SHE balances throughout her days with four kids. I told her that I did not know how SHE did it. It was the truth!
When we feel ourselves wondering how someone else does “it” or we begin to feel the first smidgen of Facebook Envy, we must remind ourselves, that EVERYONE has challenges. We ALL have struggles, or as I always say “issues”. All. Of. Us. We may not know what other women’s struggles are and we do not need to know.
Just know that NO ONE has it all together all the time. NO. ONE. We may look at each other and figure that it must be nice to have that woman’s life, but until we walk in her shoes, we have no idea. The flip side? We are allowed to have good days. These good days or hours or minutes, do not mean that we have never felt anxiety, stress, struggle, depression or pain. We all have moments were the stars align and we feel (and dare I say look) good. All. of. Us. The mix of the ups and downs, may happen in the same month, day, hour or minute. The trick is to not look at someone else’s highlight reel and compare it to your behind the scenes.
As human beings, we were not made to be perfect. As women, we were not made to prove that we have achieved perfection…to anyone, but especially to each other and most importantly to ourselves.